It was the complete dispassion with which I shredded the album that she found so cold. Truly Arctic.

I ran mine through the shredder with zero hesitation when I found it. The woman I was dating said it was the coldest thing she’d ever seen.

I bought a new microwave in 2007 to replace the 1989 model I had since college. It could boil water in under 10 minutes. It had sensor cooking and preset modes. It was life changing.