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Joined 9 months ago
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Cake day: September 24th, 2023

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  • Regardless of my own stance on these things, just happy that you intend to have the community talk about ways to change stuff. I’d browse different subreddits and found way more “X sucks, here is my emotional vent about it” than “X sucks, here are some steps I took to make it suck less or affect my life less, even if they were tiny steps to combat a massive complex problem”. Was particularly frustrating when I was searching for a solution for a problem that applied to me, even making a post about it, and I got a ton of “I have been there too, you are not alone” but no actual actionable advice. Solidarity and empathizing helps but sometimes you just want practical advice, and given just how many spaces will give you a place to vent, it would be nice to have a place free of it that sticks more to how to fix it.

    I recognize the irony of me just blathering about my feelings here, talking about how you are doing the opposite of the thing that sometimes upsets me.


  • For some people, watching something they hate fail is pleasurable, even if they understand it’s not a person who will feel shamed by their eyes and instead a corporation that is much more likely than a human to benefit from the negative attention. Getting that schadenfreude rates a little higher for some individuals than what they perceive as contributing just a tiny little bit to it by giving it attention. And sometimes, negative attention isn’t always going to benefit a company.





  • I was always annoyed by the “LMAO everyone pathetic nerd stereotype” thing they did on Reddit, only partially because it assumed everyone was a man desperate for sex from a woman. Is this comment an attempt at a joke or a genuine assessment?

    I may be a nerd and it is probably fair to say most Fediverse users are. But I’m not a basement-dweller stereotype and I’m not sure where that comes from aside from the tired old Reddit joke about all its users being that exact stereotype.

    Also, again, network effects. Go where advice exists on a nice wiki, not where it’s a new community and maybe 1 person will answer your comment if you are lucky—a lot of people just want an answer and don’t want to deal with the nonresponse and tumbleweeds from a totally new community. It is emotionally easier to toss a post about gaming into the void than it is to approach with an actual problem you have in a relationship or with your finances you need help with, then to check in daily in hope someone answered only to get crickets back, and then repost in another community (or even another site, where you might have to rewrite that post so that you can’t just look it up and find out FediverseUser83 posted the same thing as RedditUser92 and is thus probably the same person’s two accounts). So these become “why waste the effort and time when you could just go to Reddit and get a quicker response?” to an even higher level than other communities—nonresponse probably hurts more.

    For relationship advice specifically, I recall that subreddit being called unrealistic so often that I understand why people might be wary to start a new one here.

    I’m actually pretty image-conscious and a lot of this manifests in putting effort into how I dress. I am also incredibly uncomfortable putting pictures of myself (yes, you can talk about fashion without selfies, but the typical “does this look good on me” post requires you post yourself. “Look at this outfit I put together” is easiest to do with your own human body, not searching online for images of each piece of clothing you put on and putting them in one image, especially because some older pieces may not have a perfectly matching online image) on social media like Reddit, let alone the Fediverse which duplicates your post to tons of servers who may or may not respect post deletions. I’d imagine this frustrates the growth of fashion, makeup, and hair communities.