I wish my lot would sit on my legs. I got on the sofa to read…

Not in the US!

My former cat Percy would punch me in the head until I let him under the blankets at night!

For being a dickhead? I think they’re called tranquillisers.

In this very thread

You mean the seat that she lends you for a while?

It may be a horror story, but it’s unfolding!

I’m looking at a beautiful little moggie woggie, yes I am!

I used to use the books that came with the software. Now that really was the good old days!

You broth.

What a lovely cat! Judging by the pictures, she has a big personality.

Now that’s a theme park!

I too am a warrior and I raise my battleaxe to you!

No one does comfy like cats!

There seems to be too many toes as well. Of course it could be taken in Norfolk.

I won’t engage in a battle of wits with you because I don’t feel right battling the unarmed.

Dude, take your meds.

I for one, welcome our new overlord!

My brain knows how it really is, but it refuses to see anything else but this!

Would you say this in a bar with friends and strangers around the table when someone shows you a cute picture of his cat?

Yes. Especially if I was stoned.