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Joined 7 months ago
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Cake day: February 5th, 2026

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  • Not really. I have a lot of trouble relating to other straight/cis men. The more time I spend around someone, the less I like them. I pretty much hate most “masculine” stuff. I have started to prefer ephemeral stuff like talking people up in public, doing board games and trivia nights, and attending niche meetups. Friendships rarely stick, but I do see the same people periodically which is nice

    I’ve tried gaming, but card games are too expensive for my interest level, and I get burned out out video games too quickly to get into competitive stuff. A bunch of my friends from college bond over this, and it kinda sucks to feel incompatible with it. I sometimes get in on an D&D game which is great, but not especially frequent.

    I have more female and LGBTQ friends than anything, but it’s hard to feel fully included in those communities either because I’m pretty much a normie. It’s still the most positive community I am a part of and tend to earn trust and an ally pretty quickly, so I lean on it.

    I’m also pretty autistic and mostly want to talk to people about Linux, mesh networks, and data hoarding, and I have my best luck online. I’m a part of a few niche online communities and do IRL meetups and stuff.

    I work in word tech startups, and like my coworkers, but they’re not my close friends. Still, it’s the closest I get to “my people”, but it’s mostly remote work and hardly anyone ever lives near me.

    I an excellent relationship with my wife and she has a much easier time making friends. She and her friends all think it’s weird that I don’t have many close friends, and it really does feel like it’s just hard to be a social man these days.

    It does get to be hard. I do sometimes worry that I am uniquely unlikeable, but I also don’t ever get that feedback. I just have no idea where I would find the kind of friend that thinks writing NixOS flakes and Terraform scripts is a fun leisure activity.

















  • Okay, hear me out. Actually use it as a gimp mask, for BDSM stuff. Put on big headphones and play your own voice back into your ears full volume while someone edges you and slaps you around a bit, forcing you to moan into your own ears super loud if you can’t keep your mouth shut and stop complaining, while also muffling your cries so nobody but you has to hear it.

    Anyone know the brand?